According to an article published in the July 2005 issue of CIO magazine, the primary cause of leadership failure in technical organizations is poor interpersonal skills. Talented technicians are often promoted into leadership positions because of their technical skills, but many of these managers fail to reach their career potential because of underdeveloped soft skills.

To advance in technical organizations (e.g., engineering, information technology, finance), proficient technical skills are ‘table stakes.’ The highest performing leaders possess Emotional Intelligence, a term popularized by Daniel Goleman in his book of the same name. Emotional intelligence is defined as “the capacity for recognizing our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, and for managing emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.”

The good news is that most everyone can develop the five competencies identified by Goleman as contibuting to emotional intelligence. Here are the steps I recommend, using the example of someone who wants to become a better listener:

1. Begin by picking one behavior or habit that you believe may be getting in your way (e.g., poor listening).

2. Declare that you want to improve and establish a goal (e.g., I want to practice active listening in 80% of my interactions at work and at home).

3. Tell at least one other person of your intent to improve in the selected area (e.g., I’ve decided that I want to become a better listener).

4. Ask others for their support, feedback, and suggestions (e.g., Do you have any suggestions that might help me?).

5. Look for opportunities to practice the new behavior.

6. Repeat steps 4 and 5 until the more effective new behavior becomes habit.

There are a number of reasons why this process works. Anytime you declare an intent to someone else, you feel more accountable. Asking for suggestions and support reinforces that intent. As you listen to what others have to say, you become more self-aware and gain a better understanding of the impact your behavior has on others. The feedback loop will tell you when you’ve arrived at your goal.

Give it a try and see if it works for you.